Made the CHI Website

Matthew (& family) were featured in this month's e-newsletter for our agency, Children's Hope International.

http://www.childrenshopeint.org/E-News/Jan08/vietnam.htm

Consolidation - New Dang Family Website!

Well, I spent about two plus years maintaining Caleb's website only to abandon it once I got Matthew's going.

As you can imagine, life does not compartmentalize the events in Caleb's life vs. Matthew's life vs. mom, dad, and unborn baby sister for that matter. So since we are adding a new little one to the family, I have officially given up on the idea of three blogs, and will maintain one for our entire family.

So I hope you will enjoy looking at our blogs, and not find them a boring shrine to the lives of my kids, but rather an enjoyable stop on your web surfing adventures. However, I do have an ulterior motive for these blogs...they are a great way to capture our lives as they happen with significantly less glue, papercuts, time, cost, and creativity as scrapbooking. (I think I have a mutated scrapbooking gene.)

So please continue to see Matthew grow on our family's website at:

http://www.dang-family.com

A Special Reunion

How many times do you get to have lunch with someone who knew your child, held him, and cared for him before you even got a chance to lay eyes on him?

Today was a special reunion for our family. Dr. Robledo, the pediatrician from Chicago who cared for Matthew during his cleft lip surgery in March 2007 in Vietnam was in Seattle for the weekend. We had a great time with her and her friend in downtown Seattle over lunch.

Auntie Lan Lan

Auntie Lan Lan, one of mom's friends from Montreal, came to visit us this week. We had such a great time together. We did the aquarium, Salty's at Alki, Pike Place Market, Snoqualmie Falls (though it was too foggy), etc. We even proved to her that Starbucks is local coffee.

She even arrived just in time to come to my ultrasound appointment and be the first to hear "It's a girl!"

She was quite patient in putting up with the boys, and it was a lot of fun to catch up. Since we live so far apart, it is usually years between visits. Last time we saw her, Caleb was less than a month old. It was such a special treat to have her here.

A Most Amazing Discovery

I got an email from another adoptive mom. She apparently had seen a photo of Matthew on a charity's website. I thought, "Cool, maybe a glimpse of the side of Matthew's head in a snapshot or two." Little did I realize what a discovery this was.

I got to the website she referred me to and what do I see, but my own son as the front page "poster boy" on the website. It was so surreal to see your own kid on a website like that! A charitable medical organization, "Journey for Children" (http://www.journeyforchildren.org) was the group the performed Matthew's surgery in March 2007, not a group of Japanese doctors like we had been told. In fact, it was a team of medical professionals primarily from Chicago and Houston who volunteered their services. I cannot even begin to describe what an incredible thing this was to "stumble" upon.

I had a great time talking to the director of the group, TH, and they were so excited to get an update on this boy they all remembered. They had no idea that Matthew had been adopted, and I was able to email everyone on his medical team and thank them personally for their help on his behalf.

When I heard in March that Matthew was in surgery, I worried that he was all alone with no one to tend to his cries, no one to hold him when he was scared. Well, nothing could have been further from the truth. He was everyone's favorite baby, and from all accounts got excellent care from his surgeon, his pediatrician, his nurses, and his nanny from Tam Binh 2. I could not have coordinated a better situation for him even if I had a million dollars.

It has been a very special piece of Matthew's past that we can now share with him. It is extremely unlikely that we will ever find out anything more about his birth family, but this is a piece of the "before we were with you" puzzle that we can now share with him. God is so good.

These photos were taken by the JFC staff in November 2006. These are actually taken before any other photos we have of Matthew.




This is the website that features our little guy.



This is Matthew with his nanny, Jon, and Dr. Robledo (his pediatrician).



A great "after" shot.



Matthew with his favorite doctor, Dr. Robledo.



Matthew with one of the nurses, Tom Flood.

It's a Baby Sister!

Well, the ultrasound turned out great, and we are now switching big time. No more blue...we're going pink! We are having a baby girl. Everyone is very excited, except Caleb. He was very cranky at the idea of a baby girl around.

General Update from the Lazy Mom

Okay, August was quite a month for the Dangs. Matthew has now finally fully recovered from his palate surgery. After a few close calls of almost needing to take him into the ER for dehydration (kid did not want to drink anything), we finally discovered that Jamba Juice drizzled down through a straw was enough to keep the diapers saturated.

Arm restraints were not a popular item, and Matthew was smart enough to get out of them when he really wanted to get some freedom. But mostly, the diet of soft foods was very difficult, especially when his cousin and brother in the highchairs next to him are eating chicken nuggets and he was just eating soup. He is kinda a "need something to do with my hands" kinda kid, so it seemed that every meal would take over an hour and a half to get everyone nourished and cleaned...and sometimes we'd settle for just one or the other.

And if we decided that surgery and first trimester symptoms weren't enough, we decided to go TV free for August. A good experiment, and it resulted in a lot more family time and fewer dead brain cells.

Back to Matthew, now, he is back in action and just having the time of his life. Three molars have extended well into his mouth during the past few weeks, so we are done having food chopped and diced..."Lemme at the whole thing, Momma!"

And drinking is also back to normal...even taking a bottle again. Whew. What a relief. Still not sucking, but we'll get there.

He really is a huge eater. He will practically eat as much as I do...and that is saying something since I'm such a well-fed pregnant woman. Caleb is such a poor eater that I'm glad God made Matthew so much different, if not just for my own sanity's sake.

Matthew has also blossomed and grown so much in personality. The mellow laid back kid is finally learning how to defend his own turf. Having a three year old brother (almost) and a two year old cousin (almost) has made him a tough little cookie. For the first few weeks, he'd sit and helplessly watch every toy he had be confiscated by either Caleb or Colton, but now, he can fight his ground. Screaming, tantrums, crying, pulling, shoving...his new survival skills, I'm sure, but you can be assured that Momma isn't all that excited to have another so-talented toddler helping to turn up the chaos volume.

Overall, he and big brother are getting along fabulously. They are best pals and finally sharing the same room. Caleb is unable to comprehend having another baby come along. He really doesn't understand the whole pregnancy concept. Why would a baby be in my tummy when babies come from Vietnam?

Momma is fully, entirely, completely, exhaustively, overwhelmingly done with this morning (or evening) sickness and sleep-for-12-hours-a-day fatigue. Okay, I am done with it, but my body didn't get the memo. Despite the fact that the pregnancy calendar says I'm 3 weeks into my second trimester, my body is reveling in the first trimester symptoms. I'm so ready to be feeling better, but alas, I'm still here. And please, no one email me to tell me how you were nauseous and tired for the full 40 weeks. It may come as a surprise, but that doesn't make me feel any better.

Overall, though, God has been so good to us. It has been an intense summer. A new son, a new pregnancy, a new "career", surgery, etc. These were all wonderful things, but they have also been intense. Yet His Grace is sufficient, and we are so thankful for these blessings.

Photos

Well, sometime mid July we got some photos taken of the boys. I'm just finally getting around to posting them. I love these photos...and I'm sure I'll spend the rest of my life wondering how those cute little boys could grow up so fast.

Home from the Hospital

Surgery went well. Ear tubes in. Cleft palate repaired. Huge tooth strangly located under the left nostril removed.

Matthew didn't do well for the first few hours (quite mad at Mommy and Daddy for letting this happen), but slept most of the first night. (Many thanks from his Mommy for that.) We struggled with "oral adversion". The kid just didn't want to eat or drink. We finally introduced him to vanilla pudding which went down like a charm. But he refused liquids for the most part. We finally realized that ice cream is tecnically a liquid in the medical world, so with a vanilla and a chocolate in tummy, we were finally allowed to go home.

By the time he got home, he was running around like his normal self, only with arm restraints (to keep him from putting things in his mouth).

This morning he was working through the grief of losing his arm movement. He was just plain ol' mad. He couldn't stand not being able to play like normal and just let the world know. But he's hanging in there, and since all this misery is temporary, we're just taking one day at a time.

He still isn't drinking very well. Doesn't want a bottle at all. All liquid has to be spoon fed or dropped with a dropper. I think the flow of liquid in his mouth is so different than before, he can't really stand it without feeling a little clausterphobic and panicked (remember his mouth cavity is significantly smaller now). Please pray that he will get past this.

Awaiting Surgery

Tomorrow Matthew will have his cleft palate repaired. We've known this was coming since the first time we had heard about Matthew, so it's not something we're necessarily worried or scared about. We trust the reputation of the Craniofacial Clinic at Children's Hospital, but mostly the Protective Hand that brought our little one all the way to our arms from the far reaches of Vietnam. Mommy is a little bit nervous about the recovery, hoping that Matthew can be comfortable and also not damage the surgical area.

He will be on soft food (equals "yuck" to Matthew) for maybe up to a month. He will also be wearing arm restraints for the same period of time to keep little fingers, hotwheel cars, and anything delicious from his mouth. That sure sounds like fun. (Read heavy sarcasm).

I'll be spending the night with him in the hospital and he should be home on Friday. I'm mostly worried that I'll get morning sickness (misnamed...trust me!) sometime in the middle of the night when the cafeteria is closed. Please keep the little guy in your prayers.

Matthew Gets Promoted...to Big Brother!

Okay, it is finally time to make the announcement.

Matthew is going to be a big brother!

That's right! Momma here is 9 weeks pregnant. We brought back a surprise "souvenir" from Vietnam. We found out on Father's Day. I've spent the last month fighting serious fatigue and some mild nausea (not nearly as bad as I was with Caleb.) But overall, despite a very messy house, we are doing just fine.

After adjusting to the initial shock of going from 1 to 2 to 3 kids in just a flash it seems, I am really looking forward to diving into this motherhood thing full board.

I know things will be hectic for us for a few years. (Don't expect any fancy cocktail parties at the Dang's this Christmas...or for the next few Christmases for that matter!) But I am so blessed to have these kids...and at some point, diapers, highchairs, and midnight feedings will be a distant memory...just not for a while yet.

Our baby (we suspect a girl) is due February 23.

Cravings so far are for Indian food, Mediterranean food, and anything with pickles.

I asked Caleb a few days ago if he wanted me to kiss him, he shouted, "No, I don't want to get pregnant!"

Mommy Gets Promoted

Today was a bittersweet day. I called my boss, Gary, to tell him I will not be returning from adoption leave. I had to tell him that I quit. Or rather, I am getting a promotion to "full time mommy."

This has really been my "goal career" from even my early teenage days. So I am so blessed that God has provided a way for me to be able to stay at home with my kids.

I loved working for Hanesbrands, Inc. (formerly Sara Lee). For seven years, it was one of the best jobs I could have imagined...even for the past two years letting me work from home in my pajamas in Seattle, and flying me back to Winston-Salem every few months to see my friends...oh, and get some work done, too. I am so blessed that God opened the door for me there in 2000, and I will miss all the many friends I have made.

But as I continue to spend time with Matthew, I see how important it is that I spend this time with him. He really stresses when I'm not around, and while this is part of normal kid behavior, remember that I missed a whole year with him. I feel that, especially given his personality, he needs the security of a mommy around him more than I could give him had I continued working.